Fearing and Loathing Fred Thompson
Read More About: 2008 Presidential Election, Republicans,
by Mark Adams
Just a sample:
He’s Fred Thompson. You’re nothing. 
IMAO: Frank Facts About Fred Thompson:
“AWESOME FACTS ABOUT FRED THOMPSON* Fred Thompson has on multiple occasions pronounced ‘nuclear’ correctly.
* Fred Thompson has blasted more people in the face with a shotgun than even Dick Cheney.”
* Every night before going to sleep, Osama bin Laden checks under his bed for Fred Thompson.
* Fred Thompson took over what was Al Gore’s Senate seat, thereby dramatically reducing the Senate’s carbon footprint. Fred Thompson then created carbon offset offsets by wastefully burning hippies.
* The Fremen consider “Fred Thompson” a killing word.
* Only two things can kill Superman: Kryptonite and Fred Thompson.
Feel free to add your own in the comments, like:
- Fred Thompson is so macho he doesn’t need to ask … he can tell.
- Fred Thompson only drinks Tennessee Sour Mash, either Jack Daniel’s or George Dickel, straight, no ice. And he can drink more than you.
- Fred Thompson will never violate the law … he IS the Law (and Order).
- Fred Thompson has no fear of Muslims, he thinks they’re funny.
- Fred Thompson won’t doesn’t need body guards or secret service protection. Bullets bounce off his chest.
- Fred Thompson can kick Chuck Norris’ ass.
- Men and women both want to be him — and be with him.
- Good children love him and bad children fear him, (and it is rumored that Fred Thompson gets final approval of Santa Clause’s list).
- Fred Thompson will end global warming with mind control alone.
(Greg adds: Fred Thompson taught Don Corleone how to make an offer you can’t refuse. )
