Lost Their Way, Losing Their Minds
Pam doesn’t mince any words when it comes to describing the GOP’s self-evaluation in the wake of Arlen Specter’s defection and atrocious poll numbers: “We’re F*cked.”
Columnist Mark Morford is much more poetic, though just as accurate in painting the picture:
The Right goes insane
Evil overlords to flaccid clowns in the blink of Jesus’ eye. Adorable!This much we know: Hand evil a big, sticky gob of power, and it quickly becomes a feral monster, dangerous and cruel and willing to sell its own shriveled heart and the heart of its very remorseful mother for a shot at everlasting infamy, even more power and maybe some fresh, raw kitten blood, intravenously, just for the hell of it.
Oh, but take that same vile leviathan and suddenly strip away all its power and influence and capacity for wickedness, and watch it deflate like a wheezing circus tent, quickly turning into a trembling caricature of its former self, a tiny, elfin thing small enough to fit into a shoebox of panic and pathos and residual Godspit.
Behold, this delightful rule in full effect with the once portentous, now pitiable Republican party. Watch in wonder as gaff follows gaff, astonishing pronouncement follows childish meltdown, ludicrous statement leads into pure comedy of errors followed by moderate 40-year veterans of the party splitting for bluer, less abusive pastures. What a scene.
There is much good news to be found in the ongoing GOP implosion; their obsession with ‘wedge issues’ like abortion and gay marriage, along with hilarious claims of socialism and fascism are proving to be the absolute best news for the nation as a whole. Because as the GOP wallows in juvenile spectacle, Obama and the Dems are leaping headlong into one of the most ambitious, invigorating, nation-altering agendas in American history.
There’s much more, and it’s all Schadenfreude goodness with flair. It’s a good time to sit back and enjoy the show, because much like a demolition derby, you don’t see these things every day.
The Republican civil/ideological war will not last forever. As soon one of their loathsome brotherhood enjoys a smidgin of electoral success, the bandwagon will fill to capacity with saluting, lock-step marching authoritarian lemmings … teabags and all.
I know it’s WAY early and caveats regarding crystal balls and eating glass are duly noted, but that doesn’t change the fact that there are absolutely NO serious Republican threats to Barack Obama’s second term at this stage of the game. I’m sorry, but catastrophic implosions just aren’t this president’s style. And he knows style.
The “A” list, even the “B” and “C” lists of potential candidates for president in the Republican party consists of a laughable collection of small minded trolls, dwarfs lead by a snow princess from Alaska. This time, however, I can’t envision a fairy tale ending.
And until they latch onto a leader worthy of the name, they will remain fractured and laughable since the very mindset of their authoritarian followers requires someone to tell them what to do. This is a bunch of people not especially prone to original thinking. Tax cuts sounds like the same old song, and besides defending torture all they’ve got is ripping off a Tea Act protest from the 1700s to resist taxation with representation (and getting it wrong, so laughably wrong).
So starved leadership right now, as Aaron Sorkin put it, they are literally drinking the sand of Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity and Joe the (not really a) Plumber. There just aren’t any non-clowns in the party hierarchy right now, and they all know it. I just can’t see them getting it together this time around, not while David Petreaus still has ambitions to be Joint Chiefs Chair before he tosses his hat in the ring.
Maybe by the time Obama is about ready to end his second term they will get their act together and pose a threat to resurge.
Heh, I just said “surge.”
What a coincidence that the day after Election Day 2016 will be General Petraeus’ 64th birthday. They’ll rally to him, no doubt, making it at least competitive. Much to the chagrin of the ideologues and purity police running the GOP now, I don’t think the guy carries Teh Stoopid Gene they currently require to enter their fold — which is a good thing for the rest of us.
So that’s my prediction. Obama will gain a second term, easily, then in 2016 the GOP nominee will be General David Petreaus against who-the-hell-knows. In the meantime, I’m gonna have to buy more popcorn.
I have a good friend who’s a Republican. He voted for Obama (out of sheer frustration) but he wants to see conservatism rise again.
His prescription for the Republicans’ re-ascendence:
1. Strong defense
2. Smaller government
3. Higher taxes.
That’s right: higher taxes: “Both parties have overspent and it’s time to pay the piper.”
Of course for this to happen, some unnamed GOP candidate would have to Sister Souljah Grover Norquist within an inch of his life.
But I digress…
What will have to happen between now and then for this to even have a remote chance of occurring?
Phase 1: Collect Underpants
Phase 2: ?
Phase 3: Profit!
The old guard/money men were gathering this weekend (Jeb, Cantor, Romney) and we’re gonna see a struggle between them and the Christocrats in the near term. But neither of those wings will ever, ever disavow Rush or Norquist. The military wing will be the only thing able to unite them again and command the personal respect to undercut the gas bags and the bag men, ergo, my Petraeus prediction 8yrs from now.
If it doesn’t play out that way, then the Paultards will break from the Dobson wing and each will claim victory by increasing the Right by 10% — each forming their own party that gains 15% each (Jeb/Romney will keep the naming rights of GOP) … and 30% is bigger than the 20% than now admit to being part of the GOP.
BTW, Hillary beats either Petraeus/Romney or Jeb/Palin in 2016.
Oh, and the Browns will win the Superbowl, beating the Lions, 13 to 3.
Evangelicals + libertarians + fiscal conservatives + neoconservatives = 0. Basically, they cancel each other out. It just took 8 years for them to do the math.